KTMA Season

156.We’ve Got the Mouthfeel Now. [MST3K K00. The Green Slime.]

The proof-of-concept pilot for MST3K tackles The Green Slime, which leads to Chris and Charlotte talking about beginnings, Beeper, Charles Fox, Armageddon, and Minneapolis.

21.It’s Just A Tongue. [MST3K K04. Gamera vs. Barugon.]

Gamera vs. Barugon once again drizzles Beth and Adam with destructive rainbows, so they discuss janky robots, imperialism, kid-friendly adult films, tongues, tongues, and banana oil. Happy Gamuary!

42.The Original Rodney Dangerfield. [MST3K K05. Gamera.]

Gamuary in December‽ It’s a Christmas miracle, as Gamera flies in with presents for Beth and Adam, who get festive with coke ads, rat kings, world peace, excessive colours, and Christmas trees.

62.Pappy’s Tired. [MST3K K06. Gamera vs. Gaos.]

Happy Gamuary! Gamera vs. Gaos really threw us for a loop. Adam and Chris try to recombobulate themselves by reminiscing about the joys of Christmas past, beautiful film prints, fountains of blood, robot puberty, and second-rate Gamera songs.

86.He Protecc, But He Also Attacc... [MST3K K07. Gamera vs. Zigra.]

Happy Gamuary! Gamera vs. Zigra takes its first swing at Adam and Chris, who muse about our noisy ocean, some missing Gamera films, Persona 5, encore performances, and New Years Eve.

108.It’s Just A Movie. [MST3K K08. Gamera vs. Guiron.]

Gamera vs. Guiron: The match you’ve all been waiting for! Almost. Adam and Chris provide colour commentary about business casual racism, Space Gaos, weird dubs, Gamera fanfic, and memorable movie trailers.

71.In the Ant World. [MST3K K09. Phase IV.]

Phase IV coats Chris and Adam in yellow and demands that they sing the praises of ants, Saul Bass, advertising, pizza, and pasta.

44.So Much Running and Falling Down. [MST3K K10. Cosmic Princess.]

Cosmic Princess tries to make one host by editing together Beth and Adam, who report on the 30th anniversary of this MST3K episode, the 30th of Super Bowl XXIII, the 20th of Space: 1999, the 20th of Brian Blessed appearing in a Star War, and the 0th anniversary of this episode of It’s Just A Show.

130.We Could Have Cleaned This Up. [MST3K K11. Humanoid Woman.]

Humanoid Woman plays a curious tone and compels Chris and Charlotte to discuss Humanoid Woman, Through the Thorns to the Stars, Per Aspera Ad Astra, To The Stars by Hard Ways, and Через тернии к звёздам.

162.Famous People Doing Weird Things. [MST3K K13. SST: Death Flight.]

SST: Death Flight, chock full of celebrities, is flying as fast as it can to hear Chris and Charlotte talk about Lorne Greene, John de Lancie, Billy Crystal, Misty Rowe, and, you guessed it, Donald Pleasence.

153.I Missed Out on Many Fun Years. [MST3K K14. Mighty Jack.]

Mighty Jack is coming to rescue Chris and Charlotte from sick jail, but while they wait, they talk about fan clubs, fan newsletters, math equations, Japanese special effects, and bowling.

97.Stuntman On Fire. [MST3K K16. City On Fire.]

City On Fire traps Chris and Adam, who are quickly running out of oxygen as they talk about Ava Gardner, Susan Clark, Shelley Winters, Leslie Nielsen, and Max Headroom.

29.The Matlock Defense. [MST3K K17. Time of the Apes.]

Time of the Apes jumps forward in time to hear Beth and Adam discuss alternate edits, timelines without Joel, circus music, freezer burns, and Barry ZeVan [the weatherman].

82.A Spicy Meatball. [MST3K K18. The Million Eyes of Sumuru.]

The Million Eyes of Sumuru keep Adam and Chris in their sights while they discuss bad prints, bad movies, bad novels, bad episodes, and best fiends.

141.More Than Just a Psychiatrist. [MST3K K19. Hangar 18.]

Hangar 18 is filled with aliens, so the government must do everything to stop Chris and Charlotte from talking about Robert Vaughn, Gary Collins, Stuart Pankin, infomercials, and—you guessed it—Donald Pleasence.

56.Turn Up the Oil. [MST3K K20. The Last Chase.]

Beth is missing—so Adam and Chris are on The Last Chase, dodging public transit, six-million-dollar men, evil penguins, the music of Mars, and twenty-year-old cans of Coke.

Season 1

8.Scrambled Eggs. [MST3K 101. The Crawling Eye.]

The Crawling Eye, Joel's first* episode, stares at Beth and Adam until they discuss sidekicks, psychics, sci-fi eye flicks, LASIK, and awkward starts. * Or is it‽

104.Oh No! [MST3K 102. The Robot vs. the Aztec Mummy.]

The Robot vs. the Aztec Mummy are too busy fighting to notice Chris and Adam talking about early experiments, serial movies, mummification, mummy movies, and mummy cats. With the Commando Cody short, Radar Men from the Moon, part 1.

151.A Fate Worse than Death. [MST3K 103. The Mad Monster.]

The Mad Monster (with the short, Radar Men from the Moon, ep. 2) causes Chris and Charlotte to howl about the moon, the Wolf Man, Dracula, Frankenstein’s monster, and the Big Rock Candy Mountains.

157.Not My Fluid Dynamics! [MST3K 105. The Corpse Vanishes.]

The Corpse Vanishes offers Chris and Charlotte a corsage, which induces them to talk about orchids, Tiger Beat, Teen Beat, Wham-O, and tag. With the short, Radar Men from the Moon, part 3.

58.Black Licorice and Cloves. [MST3K 106. The Crawling Hand.]

The Crawling Hand creeps up on all fours towards Adam and Chris as they discuss dead astronauts, dismembered hands, emotional actors, verbal birds, and painful cereals.

37.Nothing Gets Away From Physics. [MST3K 107. Robot Monster.]

Robot Monster wants to be like the hu-man, to laugh like the hu-man. Will Adam and Beth help? Or will they whisper about childhood dreams, rocket backpacks, commie slander, déjà vu, and bumbling bees. And some shorts: Radar Men from the Moon episodes 4 & 5!

161.Nothing Horrid. [MST3K 108. The Slime People.]

The Slime People obscures Chris and Charlotte, who keep talking about volcanoes, fog, mist, domes, and slaughterhouses. (With another Radar Men from the Moon short.)

93.Gangly. [MST3K 111. Moon Zero Two.]

Moon Zero Two will strand Adam and Chris on an asteroid if they don’t find something to say about Roy Ward Baker, Hammer films, Don Ellis, space suits, and Power Gloves.

51.Wet-behind-the-ears-ness. [MST3K 112. Untamed Youth.]

Untamed Youth finds Beth and Adam guilty of loitering with Mamie van Doren, Eddie Cochran, Lurene Tuttle, Les Baxter, and Greg Brady.

Season 2

1.Nova Scotia Death Trip. [MST3K 201. Rocketship X-M.]

Rocketship X-M inspires Beth and Adam to talk about chins, Matt Damon, robot puberty, intrepid reporters, and female astronauts.

135.A Way to Be a Bad Guy Biker. [MST3K 202. The Sidehackers.]

The Sidehackers (or is it The Side Hackers?) revs its engines real loud and makes it hard for Chris and Charlotte to talk about sexual violence, friendly bikers, unfriendly bikers, sidehacking, and Rommel’s book.

33.Shaggy Little Baggies. [MST3K 204. Catalina Caper.]

Catalina Caper hosts a Tupperware party for Beth and Adam, where they chat about going to the beach, ghosts in their bikinis, grooving with your booty, gay guys in back alleys, and giving it a burp.

117.Flinching and Seething and Whimpering. [MST3K 206. Ring of Terror.]

Ring of Terror dares Chris and Charlotte to gather at the morgue and discuss bad prints, old actors, irrational fears, medical school, and invisible creeps. Featuring the short: The Phantom Creeps, episode 3! cw: Discussions of animal harm, fat shaming, and sexual assault.

136.What Do They Do in Florida? [MST3K 207. Wild Rebels.]

Wild Rebels are crunchy and punchy, but Chris and Charlotte are in to talk about symbols that were popular in Germany in the late 30s/early 40s, Florida film scenes, sad boy singers, pretty boy bikers, and driving around Florida for kicks.

137.People Working Together. [MST3K 209. The Hellcats.]

The Hellcats play tug-of-war with Chris and Charlotte as they try to discuss women bikers, gay bikers, (sorta) helpful bikers, speed chess, and cheesecake.

18.Noodling with Rubber. [MST3K 210. King Dinosaur.]

King Dinosaur roars at Adam and Beth to discuss Elliott Kalan, first timers, bad drivers, lady scientists, and other not-quite-dinosaurs. Also, there's a short: X Marks the Spot!

146.They’re Huge! [MST3K 212. Godzilla vs. Megalon.]

Happy Gamuary! This year, Chris and Charlotte broaden their scope a little, as Godzilla vs. Megalon finds them roaring about Godzilla, Jet Jaguar, Megalon, Gigan, and Squawkzilla.

Season 3

105.It’s Thong. [MST3K 301. Cave Dwellers.]

Happy Turkey Day! Cave Dwellers hang-glides right into Adam and Chris’s hearts, as they talk about early MST3K experiences, vast tracts of Keeffe, Alan Hale Jr (for some reason), Danny Elfman (again!), and Dave (?) Foley.

43.Turtle Frolics. [MST3K 302. Gamera.]

Happy Gamuary! The original Gamera emerges to listen to Beth and Adam explain all about turtle pets, turtle food, turtle myths, turtle fanciers, and a quartet of adolescent turtle warriors.

79.Normal Bands. [MST3K 303. Pod People.]

Pod People, you can do magic things! Including sending Chris and Adam flying around the room, talking about Juan Piquer Simón, Music from Some Guys in Space, Roger Roger, Pee-Wee Herman, and Andy Travis.

20.Toy Show. [MST3K 304. Gamera vs. Barugon.]

Happy Gamuary! Gamera vs. Barugon fight while Beth and Adam talk about Godzilla, Princess Mononoke, Baragon, Skeletor, and My Little Pony.

28.Apes Is Apes. [MST3K 306. Time of the Apes.]

Time of the Apes dubs over Beth and Adam as they investigate apes, damn dirty apes, naked apes, humble country apes, and owls.

63.A Monster I’d Want to Date. [MST3K 308. Gamera vs. Gaos.]

Gamuary continues as Gamera vs. Gaos causes Chris and Adam to reflect on all the Gamera villains that might have been: the octopus one, the snake one, the ice one, the other ice one, and the one covered in question marks.

127.It’s A Little Bit Bigger Now. [MST3K 309. The Amazing Colossal Man.]

The Amazing Colossal Man towers over Chris and Charlotte, as they pepper him with facts about big birthdays, tall tales, huge attractions, hearty meals, and profound mathematics.

7.I Envy Your Joy of Movement. [MST3K 311. It Conquered the World.]

It Conquered the World learned almost too late that Adam and Beth are feeling creatures, and because of it, they discuss more kick-ass 50s ladies, team sports, cults, Roger Corman, and learning almost too late that man is a feeling creature. Includes a short: Snow Thrills!

109.The Many Reasons It’s Bizarre. [MST3K 312. Gamera vs. Guiron.]

Gamuary continues as Adam and Chris watch the best Gamera episode, season 3’s take on Gamera vs. Guiron! They get to talk about the Richard Burton, Elizabeth Taylor, The Wooster Group, Mark Russell, and Michael Feinstein.

154.A Lumbering Lubbard. [MST3K 314. Mighty Jack.]

Mighty Jack once again rises out of the water and makes a bank turn to rescue Chris and Charlotte, as they talk about dedicated scientists, hot ice, Kurt Vonnegut, Herman Melville, and Betty White.

87.A Little Dab’ll Do You. [MST3K 316. Gamera vs. Zigra.]

Gamera vs. Zigra is back for round two, and Chris and Adam bring in reinforcements like robot reboots, space monsters, peppy marches, living legends, and school projects.

91.No Limousines, No Craft Services. [MST3K 317. The Saga of the Viking Women and Their Voyage to the Waters of the Great Sea Serpent.]

The Saga of the Viking Women and Their Voyage to the Waters of the Great Sea Serpent gets all tuckered out trying to say its name, and curls up to listen to Chris and Adam talk about waffles, Roger Corman, Albert Glasser, Troma, and Kate Bush. With the short, The Home Economics Story!

128.Hot Cross Buns. [MST3K 319. War of the Colossal Beast.]

Mr. B Natural pops into Chris and Charlotte’s bedrooms to talk with them about musical education, predicting the future, kids learning science, many years of solitude, and guacamole errors. Also featuring the feature, War of the Colossal Beast.

81.Fear and Silliness. [MST3K 320. The Unearthly.]

The Unearthly keeps Adam and Chris in the basement, where they can barely talk about shorts, John Carradine, shorts, Tor Johnson, and shorts. Also features the shorts Posture Pals and Appreciating Our Parents!

61.We Never Got to Play. [MST3K 321. Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.]

Let’s have a Patrick Swayze Christmas, as Santa Claus Conquers the Martians gathers Chris and Adam round to sing carols about Pia Zadora, Vince Guaraldi, Donald Pleasence, Milton Delugg, and, you guessed it, Patrick Swayze. Happy holidays, whatever you do or don’t celebrate!

65.It’s a Nice Suit. [MST3K 322. Master Ninja I.]

Master Ninja I, a “movie” that is just two episodes of failed 1984 Timothy Van Patten and Lee Van Cleef ninja-’em-up tv show The Master, leaps at Chris and Adam this Leap Day to overhear them talking about karate kids, film ventures, middling families, swamped things, and wheelchair dancing.

80.Friends, Don’t. [MST3K 323. The Castle of Fu Manchu.]

The Castle of Fu Manchu forces Chris and Adam to tell them the formula to Chistopher Lee, Jesús Franco, Sax Rohmer, Gandhi II, and, heart transplants.

66.Ninja Touchstones. [MST3K 324. Master Ninja II.]

Master Ninja II appears from the shadows to attack Chris and Adam once again as they consider ninjas, Lee van Cleef, It’s a Living, Sapphire & Steel, Milton Berle, and Tales from the Crypt.

Season 4

68.The Pace of Space. [MST3K 401. Space Travelers.]

Adam and Chris, marooned inside their homes as they wait out a pandemic, imagine they are Space Travelers. It doesn’t go so well, and so they close their eyes and think of the vastness of space, Gene Hackman, Bruce Willis, some shady producers, and some shady comedians.

123.It All Comes Back to Beastmaster. [MST3K 403. City Limits.]

City Limits drives circles around Chris and Charlotte as they talk about Kim Cattrall, James Earl Jones, Rae Dawn Chong, Robbie Benson, and Morrissey

3.Love Letter to Suburbia. [MST3K 404. Teenagers from Outer Space.]

Teenagers from Outer Space compels Beth and Adam to discuss boss rockets, boy movies, middle-aged nurses, disarmed lobsters, and small-town paranoia. Show

158.A Curse and a Plague. [MST3K 405. Being from Another Planet.]

Being from Another Planet shuffles towards Chris and Charlotte, hoping to collect their thoughts about Egyptian mummies, musical daddies, Jack Palance, Herb Edelman, and other things grandmas love.

133.My Sense of the Sublime. [MST3K 407. The Killer Shrews.]

The Killer Shrews are gnawing at Chris and Charlotte to talk about shrews, rats, dogs, cows, and college kids. Also features the short, Junior Rodeo Daredevils!

34.A Mythmash. [MST3K 408. Hercules Unchained.]

Hercules Unchained forgets all about Adam and Beth as they discuss fierce eyebrows, Greek drama, Hulk colours, creepy kitchens, and the Hellenistic ideal.

12.Beef Smoothie. [MST3K 410. Hercules against the Moon Men.]

Hercules against the Moon Men sandblasts Beth and Adam until they're ready to talk about stables, strongmen, Superman, stock, and sand.

78.Never-Ending Beefcake. [MST3K 412. Hercules and the Captive Women.]

Happy Labour Day! Hercules and the Captive Women takes the blood of Uranus and… shipwreck… shapeshifter… other stuff… anyway, it all causes Chris and Adam to think about Atlantis, Proteus, Mario Bava, Mario Mario, and Nastassja Kinski.

143.You Need to Have High Drama. [MST3K 413. Manhunt in Space.]

Manhunt in Space has Rocky Jones, Space Ranger, and his pal Winky chase after Chris and Charlotte among the stars, as they discuss stethoscopes, soap operas, space operas, sprucing up, and seeing colours. With a short: part of an episode of General Hospital!

147.A Terrible Word for Love-Making. [MST3K 415. The Beatniks.]

The Beatniks avoids anything too far out, but Chris and Charlotte have a gas talking about Paul Frees, pocket pool, dippy slang, store-bought cake, and controversial troll dolls. Also features another General Hospital short!

144.Swoon Tune. [MST3K 417. Crash of Moons.]

Rocky and Winky are back for Crash of Moons (or Crash of the Moons, if you like). But as Chris and Charlotte try to escape their trajectory, they talk about old news, rogue planets, happy leaders, bizarre tv shows, and broken guitars. Featuring another General Hospital short!

113.Heartbreaking, But Not Heartbreaking. [MST3K 418. Attack of the the Eye Creatures.]

Attack of the the Eye Creatures just doesn’t care as Chris and Charlotte as they discuss Larry Buchanan, Tommy Kirk, Ethan Allan, Lucille Ball, and Lawrence Welk.

150.Sophisticated Jokes About Film. [MST3K 419. The Rebel Set.]

The Rebel Set (with the short, Johnny at the Fair) makes Beth and Charlotte reminisce about visiting Chicago, Toronto, Winnipeg, the Canadian National Exhibition, and Hellzapoppin’.

89.Fleeting Scenes. [MST3K 421. Monster A Go-Go.]

Monster A Go-Go calls up Adam and Chris [rrring rrring!] and asks them about bad twists, anti-endings, cheap solutions, ice treats, and He-Man. With the short, Circus on Ice!

85.Clowns in the Wild. [MST3K 422. The Day the Earth Froze.]

The Day the Earth Froze offers a Sampo to the team — if they first talk about the Kalevala, Finlandization, Jean Sibelius, Emmett Kelly, and family photos. Also features a short: Here Comes the Circus!

99.I Have Enough Friends. [MST3K 423. Bride of the Monster.]

Bride of the Monster traps Adam and Chris in the swamp and gets them to monologue about Edward D. Wood Jr., Bela Lugosi, Tor Johnson, octopuses, and door-to-door sales. Features the short: Hired! Part 1.

100.A Cult Favourite. [MST3K 424. Manos: The Hands of Fate.]

In our very special one-hundredth episode, Manos: The Hands of Fate keeps our heroes talking for a long, long time about notorious movies, controversial jazz, weird zeitgeists, stale comics, and exactly what MST3K does that makes us love it so. Features the short, Hired, part 2!

Season 5

14.Donald Pleasence Was a Total Scamp. [MST3K 501. Warrior of the Lost World.]

Happy Donald Pleasence Day! Warrior of the Lost World mumbles at Beth and Adam to discuss Lt. Illia, Counselor Troi, Kirok, Gene Roddenberry, and Robert Ginty.

118.Heart of a Champion. [MST3K 502. Hercules.]

Happy Labour Day! That famous dodecalabourer, Hercules, asks Chris and Charlotte to talk about mythmashes, golden fleece, Hercules failing to perform, old ads, and patooties.

121.Weenie Roast! [MST3K 503. Swamp Diamonds.]

Swamp Diamonds drags Chris and Charlotte into the bayou to ask them about Mike “Touch” Connors, Beverly Garland, Fred Mertz, tuna wiggle, and racist fire drills. With the short: What to Do on a Date.

124.Thank You, Heads! [MST3K 505. The Magic Voyage of Sinbad.]

The Magic Voyage of Sinbad finds not the Bird of Happiness but the Chris and Charlotte of Chatting, as they discuss Sinbad, Sadko, Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakoff, novelty chess, and instant coffee.

11.Cobbled Together in Somebody’s Backyard. [MST3K 506. Eegah.]

Eegah comes out of his cave to hear Beth and Adam discuss Arch Hall Sr, Arch Hall Jr, archconservative film critics, archetypical cavemen, and Archie comics.

59.I Am Thinking: Oh No. [MST3K 508. Operation Double 007.]

Operation Double 007, a.k.a. Operation Kid Brother, reads Chris and Adam’s lips as they discuss James Bond, Moneypenny, M, Ennio Morricone, and Jessye Norman. Happy Turkey Day!

26.A More Romantic Alternative. [MST3K 509. The Girl in Lovers Lane.]

The Girl in Lovers Lane drifts into town and asks Beth and Adam about hoboes, littler hoboes, homosociality, character actors, and promotional toilet seats.

48.The Cleanliness and Tightness. [MST3K 510. The Painted Hills.]

The Painted Hills moderates as Beth and Adam debate about good dogs, messy dogs, gold logs, backwards gods, and the need for clean. Includes a short: Body Care and Grooming.

9.Burned in My Brain. [MST3K 513. The Brain that Wouldn't Die.]

The Brain that Wouldn't Die introduces Beth and Adam to Mike, and begs them to talk about sexpoiltation, gore, Saw, transplants, and two-headed dogs.

60.Going On and Going Nowhere. [MST3K 515. The Wild Wild World of Batwoman.]

What’s this?! The Wild Wild World of Batwoman has forced our heroes, Chris and Adam, to dance the Batusi? Tune in as they discuss the real Batman, another Batwoman, disappointing Draculas, a not-quite Hercules, and ho-hum Days. With the short: Cheating.

57.You Can Afford Donald Pleasence. [MST3K 516. Alien from L.A.]

Alien from L.A. tries to sell big-boned surface-dwellers Beth and Adam as they talk about Donald “It’s my birthday!” Pleasence, Kathy “Three syllables???" Ireland, Angela “I’d give anything to see my dad again” Pleasence, Menahem “I once worked with DP” Golan, and Yoram "Me too" Globus.

52.Amoral Philosophy. [MST3K 519. Outlaw.]

Outlaw [of Gor] shows a lot of flesh in the hopes that Beth and Adam will visit its planet with tales of dubious philosophers, stunt directors, call-girl rackets, one-handed push-ups, and disgusting worms!

19.Money and Weapons. [MST3K 521. Santa Claus.]

Ho ho ho! Santa Claus gathers Beth and Adam by the yule log to discuss all things Christmas, like Citizen Kane, Batman, Pee-wee‘s Playhouse, Home Alone, and Hellraiser.

102.Pinteresque. [MST3K 522. Teen-age Crime Wave.]

Teen-age Crime Wave gets Chris and Adam to talk about strong perfume, claustrophobic films, Tommy Cook trivia, bad kids, and (you guessed it) Donald Pleasence.

83.Mister Big. [MST3K 523. Village of the Giants.]

Village of the Giants towers over Adam and Chris, demanding they talk about Jim Begg, Andy Griffith, Warwick Davis, Bert I. Gordon, and Frank Zappa.

160.Fast Car Go Vroom. [MST3K 524. 12 to the Moon.]

12 to the Moon saves two seats for Chris and Charlotte, who pretend to be experts in concept cars, driving anxiety, space politics, one-woman shows, and Wall Drug. With the musical short, Design for Dreaming!

Season 6

6.It’s Good When People Age. [MST3K 601. Girls Town.]

Girls Town lifts and separates Beth and Adam as they discuss Mamie Van Doren, Paul Anka, Mel Tormé, Mamie Van Doren (again), and Canada.

16.Good Job, Thor. [MST3K 604. Zombie Nightmare.]

Zombie Nightmare rises from the grave to stalk Beth and Adam, who just wanted to talk about Canucksploitation, heavy metal soundtracks, voodoo, Vodou, and Adam West.

139.Born From Stone. [MST3K 605. Colossus and the Headhunters.]

Happy Dodecalabour Day! Uh, a little belated. Turns out Hercules couldn’t make it, and so we’ve got Colossus and the Headhunters rushing after Chris and Charlotte as they talk about Nummymuffincoocolbutter, Maciste, Hercules’s son, Pound Puppies, and good kitties.

163.You Can Never Really Tell How Dirty It Is. [MST3K 606. The Creeping Terror.]

Happy (belated) Halloween! The Creeping Terror slowly approaches Chris and Charlotte and overhears them discussing carpet samples, Vic Savage, Ed Wood, avant-garde composers, and Love, American Style!

72.I Have Fallen Down. [MST3K 609. The Skydivers.]

The Skydivers pours hot coffee onto Chris and Adam’s parachutes, but as they plunge to their deaths, they talk about Coleman Francis, Tony Cardoza, the joys of woodworking, fine cups of coffee, and the latest fashions of Hobbiton. With the short: Why Study Industrial Arts?

50.Horror, Punishment, Redemption. [MST3K 610. The Violent Years.]

The Violent Years celebrates our fiftieth (!) episode by treating Beth and Adam to some Ed Wood, old-timey titillation, new country, squishy electronics, and uncanny dummies. Includes a short: Young Man’s Fancy!

27.Emmanuelle in Flight. [MST3K 612. The Starfighters.]

The Starfighters puts fuel back in Beth and Adam so they can discuss boogers, boozers, fighters, killers, and choristers.

164.The Need to Be Fancy. [MST3K 613. The Sinister Urge.]

Ed Wood’s The Sinister Urge leads Chris and Charlotte down a dark path towards smut, dirty pictures, deathly orgies, love feasts, and taking it out in trade. Thank goodness this experiment also features an educational short about Keeping Clean and Neat!

116.Completely Unrecognizable. [MST3K 614. San Francisco International.]

San Francisco International pats down Chris and Charlotte to see if they’re holding any information on Pernell Roberts, Lorne Greene, Dan Blocker, Michael Landon, or the Ponderosa Ranch.

84.There Was No Way She Was Gonna Win. [MST3K 615. Kitten with a Whip.]

Kitten with a Whip meows pitifully at Adam and Chris until they talk about horrifying teens, Ann-Margrock, Elvis Presley, John Forsythe, Doodles Weaver, and Looney Tunes.

49.You Get Concussions. [MST3K 616. Racket Girls.]

Racket Girls ogles Adam and Beth as they wrestle over favourite episodes, stock footage auteurs, foxy boxing, Lisa Loeb, and so many Stooges. Includes a short: Are You Ready for Marriage?

145.A Cold Place. [MST3K 617. The Sword and the Dragon.]

Happy Holidays! Let’s gather round to hear the tale of The Sword and the Dragon, or at least let’s hear Chris and Charlotte talking about Ilya Muromets, Ingmar Bergman, August Strindberg, Sven, and Ole.

155.Lie Face Down on the Ground. [MST3K 618. High School Big Shot.]

High School Big Shot is a bleak movie, but it tempts Chris and Charlotte into talking about Roger Corman, Mother Nature, specialty breads, Abe Lincoln, and Tom’s Diner.

74.As Remote and Still as Possible. [MST3K 619. Red Zone Cuba.]

Red Zone Cuba lures Adam and Chris to an endless montage of Coleman Francis, Cuban history, Night Train, bad posture, and old jalopies. With the short: Speech: Platform Posture and Appearance!

2.Collage of Male Adolescence. [MST3K 620. Danger!! Death Ray.]

Danger!! Death Ray coaxes Beth and Adam into discussing satellite dishes, glamour shots, beefy spies, André the Giant, and Herbie Hancock.

73.Known Weirdo. [MST3K 621. The Beast of Yucca Flats.]

The Beast of Yucca Flats. How did it get there? Chris and Adam. Two podcasters. Not yet caught by the whirlwind of progress. Trained to look for topics and talk about them. Benjamin Franklin. Puerto Rico. Coleman Francis. Tony Cardoza. And endless narration, caught in the wheels of justice.

69.Nice. [MST3K 622. Angels Revenge.]

Even though Angels Revenge is out to stop Chris and Adam from pushing their wares, they manage to talk about all the great stars: Jack Palance, Pat Buttrum, Jim Backus, Johnny Wadd, and Stanley Kubrick!

Season 7

88.Shirtless the Whole Time. [MST3K 701. Night of the Blood Beast.]

Night of the Blood Beast impregnates Chris and Beth with thoughts of new phones, old interiors, friendly aliens, male pregnancy, and Turkey Day marathons.

101.The Camera Loves Rondo. [MST3K 702. The Brute Man.]

The Brute Man creeps after Adam and Chris, who discuss Manos reactions, Rondo Hatton, early travelogue movies, early chickens, and egg facts. Features the short: The Chicken of Tomorrow.

30.Let’s Make It Work. [MST3K 703. Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell.]

Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell deathstalks Adam and Bethstalker as they deathtalk about fonts, swords, sorcery, batches, and Ren Faires. Huzzah!

38.A Pizza Being Made in Real Time. [MST3K 704. The Incredible Melting Man.]

The Incredible Melting Man keeps an eye out for Adam and Beth as they talk about horror movies, horror comedies, horror effects, horrors in space, and horror stories from Hollywood.

Season 8

22.Respective Blowhole. [MST3K 801. Revenge of the Creature.]

Revenge of the Creature tries to steal Beth and Adam's hearts with talk of Gill-Man, Guillermo del Toro–Man, Marineland-Man, Henry Mancini-Man, and a new Crow-Man T. Robot-Man.

23.You’ve Got to Kill a Man. [MST3K 802. The Leech Woman.]

The Leech Woman picks Beth and Adam’s brains about lecherous men, older women, alcoholics, unpleasant co-workers, and anything but leeches.

24.Every Framing Device a Painting. [MST3K 803. The Mole People.]

The Mole People gets Beth and Adam to recite an epic of hollow-earth theories, the Epic of Gilgamesh, celebrity cameos, mushrooms, and astronauts of note.

25.Don’t Eat the Good Bug. [MST3K 804. The Deadly Mantis.]

The Deadly Mantis emerges from the ice to ask Beth and Adam about bug-eyed monsters, bug-eyed bugs, bloody-minded militarists, stop-motion brains, and bomb-loving mutants.

75.Peanut Butter. [MST3K 805. The Thing That Couldn’t Die.]

The Thing That Couldn’t Die, using plenty of lip and tongue action, psychically commands Chris and Adam to discuss heterosexuality, horror movies, Emperor Hadrian, the Wild West, and Sir Francis Drake’s cakes.

76.Thanks for Being You. [MST3K 806. The Undead.]

The Undead follows Chris and Adam back in time, where they talk about The Tingler, Roger Corman, Billy Barty, The Thomas Crown Affair, and (you guessed it) the Cryptkeeper.

77.Hella Jellyfish. [MST3K 807. Terror from the Year 5000.]

Terror from the Year 5000 can’t decide whether to steal Chris’s or Adam’s face. Meanwhile, they talk about The Tingler, American International Pictures, intergalactic vacations, KITT, and chiggers.

90.The Darkest of Pasts. [MST3K 808. The She-Creature.]

The She-Creature lurches unpleasantly towards Chris and Adam, but instead they talk about Alibi, Wings, Manimal, Howard the Duck, and Dorf on Golf.

92.Were You A Teenage Anything? [MST3K 809. I Was A Teenage Werewolf.]

I Was A Teenage Werewolf stalks Adam and Chris in the gym, overhearing them talk about teen movies, wolfmen, Michael Landon, Bernard Hermann, and Magic Voice.

94.A Hate Letter to Wisconsin. [MST3K 810. The Giant Spider Invasion.]

The Giant Spider Invasion invite Adam and Chris to come inside, but they roll down a hill and talk about spider puppets, mothers’ friends, gross directors, body snatchers, and baby ducks.

96.Down The Freak Flag. [MST3K 811. Parts: The Clonus Horror.]

Parts: The Clonus Horror keeps Adam and Chris in a secluded area to get them to talk about clones, clones, clones, clones, and clones.

98.Two Terrible Tastes That Somehow Taste Great Together. [MST3K 812. The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies!!?]

The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies!!? may not be all that Adam and Chris have to contend with this time!!? They talk about Ray Dennis Steckler, Renée Richards, Wendy Carlos, Peter Falk, and the alleged Mrs. Peter Falk.

107.The Root of All Relationship Problems. [MST3K 813. Jack Frost.]

Jack Frost chills Chris and Adam to the holiday bone, and they try to keep warm by discussing Russian folk tales, a pumpkin Christmas tale, evil stepmothers, scary old women, and Yakov Smirnoff’s love advice.

110.Yokel Personas. [MST3K 814. Riding With Death.]

Riding With Death has Chris and Beth trapped in the back of a tractor trailer, as they talk about white dots, invisible men, unexpected charisma, tasty knishes, and flying dreams. (Also there’s some important news about the show!)

114.Pie Palindrome Pie. [MST3K 815. Agent for H.A.R.M.]

Agent for H.A.R.M. offers Chris and Charlotte a comfy cardigan to keep them warm as they discuss spies, panties, Prince, palindromes, and pies.

119.Justice for Waluigi. [MST3K 816. Prince of Space.]

Happy (you guessed it) Donald Pleasence Day! Oh no, the dastardly Prince of Space has invaded, hoping to steal our precious reserves of Donald Pleasence! Luckily his weapons are useless against Chris and Charlotte, who instead talk about wormholes, stargates, portals, haiku, and Lutherans.

120.Shaking It and Waiting for the Horrors to Come. [MST3K 817. The Horror of Party Beach.]

Happy Halloween! The Horror of Party Beach emerges from the beach to interrupt Chris and Charlotte as they discuss beach parties, Broadway shows, ballads, body hair, and BOO! [Did we scare you?]

122.My Own Personal Creepy Doll. [MST3K 818. Devil Doll.]

Happy Turkey Day! Chris and Charlotte are having dinner with a Devil Doll, and they’re having awkward conversation about creepy dolls, rowdy dorms, endless puppets, ice cream, and Magic: The Gathering.

126.Down with the Pickle. [MST3K 819. Invasion of the Neptune Men.]

Invasion of the Neptune Men finds Chris and Charlotte talking about Prince of Space, traditional Japanese theatre, Braille, pickles, and crackers.

129.Encyclopedia Mouthfeel. [MST3K 820. Space Mutiny.]

Space Mutiny throws Chris Hardcheese and Charlotte Manmuscle over a railing while they talk about Battlestar Galactica, Captain America, Jane Fonda, Annie Sprinkle, and body positivity.

46.Nothing Really Changes. [MST3K 821. Time Chasers.]

Time Chasers will follow Beth and Adam anywhere, anywhen, in order to hear them talk about ancient aliens, altered timelines, alternative transportation, altercations on the high seas, and beautiful Vermont.

64.Casablanca on a Whim. [MST3K 822. Overdrawn at the Memory Bank.]

Overdrawn at the Memory Bank dopples into the network to ask Adam and Chris to interface with Raul Julia, Doctor Who, Casablanca, tote bags, and anteaters. And remember, podcasts like this wouldn’t be possible without listeners like you.

Season 9

131.The Immenseness of That Power. [MST3K 901. The Projected Man.]

The Projected Man beams itself into Chris and Charlotte’s lives, and so they talk about 4D Man, Lee Meriwether, Ralph Carmichael, Bert from Sesame Street, and Andrei Tarkovsky.

159.Richard Kiel’s Cow. [MST3K 902. The Phantom Planet.]

The Phantom Planet brings Chris and Charlotte down to its own size, while they discuss serving man, making a killing, nutty confections, Andy Rooney, and women in space.

36.Donald Pleasence is Always Hypnotic. [MST3K 903. The Pumaman.]

The Pumaman leaps awkwardly towards Beth and Adam, asking them to reveal the truth about Donald Pleasence, anti-fascists, ancient aliens, dinky synth tunes, and how to fly.

13.He’s Just A Guy. [MST3K 904. Werewolf.]

Werewolf hunts Beth and Adam as they discuss poor acting, imported myths, impure werewolves, pure moods, and imposter puppets.

134.To Live Amongst The Bees. [MST3K 905. The Deadly Bees.]

The Deadly Bees are swarming around Chris and Charlotte, distracting them as they try to talk about timelines, mysteries, nuisances, knees, and spices.

142.Get a Broom. [MST3K 907. Hobgoblins.]

Hobgoblins emerge out of their vault to let Chris and Charlotte live out their fantasy of talking about hobgoblins, gremlins, regular goblins, hobbits, and other scary things.

103.She’s So Flexible. [MST3K 908. The Touch of Satan.]

The Touch of Satan compels Adam and Chris to mull over spooky movies, harpsichord music, eighteenth-century bad boys, curious products, and… Gorgo?

53.The Snaggletoothed Frodo. [MST3K 910. The Final Sacrifice.]

Happy Canada Day! The Final Sacrifice is on the hunt for Beth and Adam, so they explore the Great White North talking about Jon Mikl Thor, The Red Green Show, Ed the Sock, Mike Myers, and other milestones in Canadian culture.

140.What People Really Did Back Then. [MST3K 913. Quest of the Delta Knights.]

Huzzah! Quest of the Delta Knights finds Chris and Charlotte in the medieval early ’90s, where they drink mead and discuss things like David Warner (good), David Warner (evil), David Warner (virtual), David Warner (narrator), and the Pleasure Faire.

Season 10

35.There’s Still Money to Be Made in Tragedy. [MST3K 1002. Girl in Gold Boots.]

Girl in Gold Boots shimmies as Beth and Adam kick about castle dwellers, caged dancers, creepy discotheques, crushed dreams, and child-rearing demonstrations.

4.Yelling at Dinosaurs. [MST3K 1004. Future War.]

Future War kicks off Beth and Adam’s discussion of revivals, rad 90s dinosaurs, dad movies, secret Christians, and other strange animals.

148.Off-Brand Nudie. [MST3K 1008. Final Justice.]

It’s Final Justice for Chris and Charlotte, who are sentenced to talk about Joe Don Baker, Greydon Clark, Yes, Malta, and Geronimo.

17.Get Serious. [MST3K 1009. Hamlet.]

Hamlet broods while eavesdropping on Adam and Dr. Beth talking about being, not being, suffering, sleeping, and the undiscovered country of Germany.

152.It’s Like Ballet. [MST3K 1010. It Lives By Night.]

It Lives By Night gains bat powers and tries to hunt down Chris and Charlotte, who just want to talk about Lou, Murray, Ted, Sue Ann, and Mary.

67.A Very Basic Thing. [MST3K 1012. Squirm.]

Squirm seems to have already eaten Adam, so Beth rushes in to help Chris escape through worms, egg creams, Georgia, antiques, and a surprising lack of springs. For this episode also features a short: A Case of Spring Fever. No springs!

Season 11

10.All Sizzle, All Snake. [MST3K 1101. Reptilicus.]

Reptilicus seduces Beth and Adam into discussing Jonah Heston, weird cameos, multiple Reptilci, Danish tourism, and trashy novelizations.

5.Coke Will Do All the Work for You. [MST3K 1102. Cry Wilderness.]

Cry Wilderness howls at Beth and Adam to discuss ice cream college, Mac and Me, Bigfoot, raccoons, and the puberty giggles.

47.Let’s Start Again and Do It Right This Time. [MST3K 1103. The Time Travelers.]

The Time Travelers walk through a time screen to time Beth and Adam as they talk about cuddle parties, pink androids, not-quite-mutants, mangled endings, and other purgatories.

95.More Brown’s a-Comin’. [MST3K 1104. Avalanche.]

Avalanche finds Chris and Adam drinking cocoa in the ski lodge, talking about disastrous movies, disastrous weather, disastrous managers, disastrous marriages, and disastrous vacations.

149.Dinosaurs for Who Knows What End. [MST3K 1105. The Beast of Hollow Mountain.]

The Beast of Hollow Mountain shows up much too late to hear Chris and Charlotte talk about killer cats, dinosaurs, cowboys, cows, and Wallace Shawn.

15.We Spent a Lot of Money on This. [MST3K 1106. Starcrash.]

Starcrash dazzles Beth and Adam as they discuss Christmas lights, space wardrobes, child preachers, drunk Hasselhoff, and inobservant observational comedians.

55.The Ultimate Boomer. [MST3K 1108. The Loves of Hercules.]

Happy Labour Day! Adam and Beth celebrate the original dodecalabourer by exploring The Loves of Hercules—including Jayne Mansfield, Loni Anderson, old smurfs, marble columns, and Eddie Vedder.

31.Beverly Hills 9021Wizard. [MST3K 1110. Wizards of the Lost Kingdom.]

Wizards of the Lost Kingdom seeks out Beth and Adam for recycled clips, recycled music, creepy seductions, kept crypts, and ambiguous colours.

32.The Local Skeezeballs. [MST3K 1111. Wizards of the Lost Kingdom II.]

Wizards of the Lost Kingdom II casts a spell on Beth and Adam to reveal all about heroes, horndogs, homosociality, homicides, and hocus pocus.

70.Found in a Warehouse. [MST3K 1112. Carnival Magic.]

There’s a chimp on the loose as Carnival Magic kidnaps Chris and Adam to ask them about that magic moment between the 70s and the 80s, the mysteries of Al Adamson, lost pornography, unnamed directors, and chimps ahoy!

40.Grandfather Clocks in Drag. [MST3K 1114. At the Earth’s Core.]

At the Earth’s Core drills Beth and Adam about endurance tests, mesmerizing actors, overwrought styles, long-lasting ideologies, and deep-seated commitments.

Season 12

41.The Best America Has to Offer. [MST3K 1201. Mac and Me.]

Mac and Me will drill holes into Beth and Adam’s living rooms if they don’t talk about product placement, Coca-Cola™, America™, McDonald’s™, and Steven Spielberg™.

54.Thoughts about Stucco. [MST3K 1203. Lords of the Deep.]

Lords of the Deep sinks Adam and Beth’s hopes at completely overcoming their Summer of Technical Difficulties. On this episode, we encounter undersea aliens, Roger Constantius Corman, Three’s Company, Fantastic Voyages, and kombucha cocktails.

45.The Rise of Geodesic Domes. [MST3K 1204. The Day Time Ended.]

The Day Time Ended quietly turns on the light for Beth and Adam so they can talk about 1970s sci-fi, 1970s patriarchs, 1970s Bands, 1970s couches, and 1880s pizza.

106.Not a Sausage. [MST3K 1206. Ator, The Fighting Eagle.]

Ator, The Fighting Eagle absolutely refuses to admit to the existence of prehistoric hang-gliders, leaving Adam and Chris with nothing to talk about except Cave Dwellers, Joe D’Amato, prurient films, Rodney Dangerfield, and D&D. [see notes for content warnings!]

Season 13

111.The Mask of Lucha Libre. [MST3K 1301. Santo in the Treasure of Dracula.]

A new season of MST3K emerges, offering Santo in the Treasure of Dracula, which asks Beth and Chris if it may enter to talk with them about lurid colours, luchadors, vampires, cognac, and cemeteries.

132.Misogynist Jerkpants. [MST3K 1302. Robot Wars.]

Robot Wars avoids war with any other robots by peacefully transporting Chris and Charlotte as they talk about Barbara Crampton, Lisa Rinna, Barb, Star, and a punching bag.

112.A New Voice in the Room. [MST3K 1303. Beyond Atlantis.]

Beyond Atlantis welcomes a new host — or two? In addition to greeting Emily on the Simulator of Love, it listens in while Chris and new cohost Charlotte discuss the Philippines, Atlantis, Donovan, Middle-Earth, and Alison Bechdel.

115.I Love Tom’s Old Voice! [MST3K 1306. Demon Squad.]

Demon Squad applies some prosthetics to Chris and Charlotte’s faces as they talk about film noir, fancy hats, Hummel figurines, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and Mobile, Alabama.

125.Whether It Is Nasty or Not... [MST3K 1307. Gamera vs. Jiger.]

Happy Gamuary! This time, it’s Gamera vs. Jiger in the battle to win the hearts of Chris and Charlotte, as they think about parasites, pregnancies, world’s fairs, accents, and choosing your own adventures!

138.This Is Not A Secret! [MST3K 1308. The Batwoman.]

The Batwoman (La mujer murciélago) swims towards the good ship It’s Just A Show, where Chris and Charlotte are talking about Mexican resorts, Mexican cosmopolitanism, Mexican movies, Mexican luchadoras, and menstrual products.

165.The Taste of Condiments to Come. [MST3K 1310. H.G. Wells’ The Shape of Things to Come.]

H.G. Wells’ The Shape of Things to Come offer Chris and Charlotte a glimpse into their future, where they will find they have discussed H.G. Wells, The Shape of Things to Come, Things to Come, the future of condiments, and the horror of it all.

Movies, Specials, and Stuff

39.Go Big or Go Home. [MST3K: The Movie, featuring This Island Earth.]

This Island Earth rams its ovipositor down Beth and Adam’s throats (but it’s not an alien!) during an awkward dinner party exchange about interocitors, interfering studios, interplanetary strife, interloping cats, and international space research.

51b.Sentimentality and Familiarity. [MST3K Little Gold Statue Preview Special.]

Beth and Adam are experiencing a Summer of Technical Difficulties, so they’ve lined up some Very Special Special Specials! First up is the MST3K Little Gold Statue Preview Special, a rundown of all the great Academy Award–nominated films of 1994—including gems like Small Soldiers and Junior!

52b.Death and Longing. [The 1st Annual Summer Blockbuster Review.]

Our Summer of Technical Difficulties continues with a look at The 1st Annual Summer Blockbuster Review! Mike and the Bots had their turn talking about the biggest movies of 1997, so why not Adam and Beth?

53b.Cockroaches and Spiders. [Academy of Robots’ Choice Awards Special.]

Our Summer of Technical Difficulties continues with a look at the Academy of Robots’ Choice Awards Special! Mike and the Bots once again preview the Oscars. Do their hot takes hold up? Do the Academy’s? Beth and Adam make the final judgment about the prestige pieces of 1997.

53c.Muddy and Filthy. [2nd Annual Summer Blockbuster Review.]

Our Summer of Technical Difficulties hopefully comes to an end with the final movie speical, the 2nd Annual Summer Blockbuster Review! Do the summer hits of 1998 hold up twenty-one years later? Only Beth and Adam are allowed to decide.

58b.He, Too, Has Legs. [MST3K Live! The Great Cheesy Movie Circus Tour, featuring Circus of Horrors and No Retreat, No Surrender.]

In this very special episode, Chris tells Adam all about going to see MST3K Live! The Great Cheesy Movie Circus Tour.

118b.Salute Your Shorts. [MST3K Short of the Month Club, part 1.]

Chris and Charlotte enjoy the first few shorts from Season 13’s Short of the Month Club!

131b.Bicyclists Were There for Us. [MST3K Short of the Month Club, part 2.]

Chris and Charlotte were live in Portland, Oregon, to look at two recently riffed shorts on a topic that is dear to all Portlanders’ hearts: bicycle safety! The Bicycle Driver and Bicycling Visual Skills both want to teach us about how to share the road with cars safely.

136b.Touched by a Joel. [MST3Kon!]

Chris and Charlotte went to Blobfest and MST3Kon! And so now they’re going to tell you all about meeting Joel, meeting Jonah, meeting Emily, meeting the Blob, and meeting oppressive amounts of humidity.

143b.A Little Meaningful. [MST3K Turkey Day Marathons, 1991–1993.]

Happy Turkey Day! Chris and Charlotte celebrate by rewatching the bumpers and commercials for the first few Turkey Day Marathons! Reminisce with them about Thanksgiving traditions, Thanksgiving television, Thanksgiving hymns, Thanksgiving foods, and so many turkeys.

149b.What Even Is This. [This Is MST3K and The Making of Mystery Science Theater 3000.]

This Is MST3K (from season 4) and The Making of Mystery Science Theater 3000 (from season 8) get Chris and Charlotte talking about M, S, T, 3, and K.

164b.The Adam Westness of It All. [MST3K Turkey Day Marathons, 1994–1997.]

Happy Turkey Day! Chris and Charlotte celebrate with another batch of bumpers and commercials from Turkey Days gone by. This time they get to talk about Adam West, Beverly Garland, Mamie Van Doren, Jack Perkins, and Michael Feinstein.

Bonus Bits

4b.Totally Uncontroversial Opinions about MST3K’s Sci-Fi Era. [Bonus.]

A bonus episode! Adam and Beth, fresh from rewatching Future War, have thoughts on MST3K’s years on the Sci-Fi Channel. Listener discretion advised.

7b.Tom Servo’s a Dalek. [Bonus.]

Bonus episode! Adam and Beth discuss: Adam West, bad movies, Canada (again), the weirdest thing to ever air on PBS, and (occasionally) MST3K.

24b.Our First Anniversary Spectacular!

Producer Chris invites Beth and Adam to look back over the 24 episodes of MST3K we’ve watched in the past year. Which movie would they watch unMSTed? Which episode was the best? Which monster is the ginchiest? And what did you, the listener at home, think?

87b.Bonus Bits A-Go-Go!

We’re only gonna get one real episode out this month, for Reasons. So to tide you over until then, here are a few of our superfan bonus bits—the things we normally just let our most devoted listeners hear. Enjoy, and see. you soon with a proper episode!

152b.Sick Day.

Chris and Charlotte are sick, so here are some bonus bits to tide you over until we get better.